Post by The Jew Blazer on Feb 18, 2018 16:22:16 GMT
“How? How is it possible?” Johnny Maverick asks, watching as the 150 pound Jewchador Joshua Goldstein finishes his fifth plate of pancakes.
“How is what possible?” Josh asks, he looks to the waitress who rolls her eyes and puts in an order for another stack.
“Nevermind… so how are things in the UK?” Johnny asks.
“Rad, for the most part. I dunno. Hammerstein used to be really good friends but he seems to have gotten….crazy.” Josh says, lamenting the actions of his old friend and former half of the ‘Jewish Hammers’ tag team.
“It’s the rule of tag teams. 90% of the time one half of the tag team starts to succeed more than the other and jealousy starts to rear its ugly head. It’s unfortunate but that’s typically how shit tends to work out.” Johnny says to his good friend and former wrestling student as he sips on a cup of coffee. Josh’s phone buzzes and he opens it up to read his twitter feed.
“Oh.” Josh says.
‘Oh? Good oh? Bad oh? ” Johnny responds.
“Weird Oh. Hammerstein has been pulled from the match. I’ve been set up with a new opponent.” Josh says.
“That’s probably a bad Oh.” Johnny says as another plate of pancakes is set in front of Josh.
“How do you figure? He’ll get his shot eventually. I’m not backing down from a fight” Josh says as he starts to pour syrup on his pancakes.
“I mean, I get that. Do you really think this situation of all things is going to facilitate a rational response from him? Not a chance, Floofy.” Johnny says.
“Well, I mean… do you wanna fly out with me and watch my back.” Josh asks.
“Fuck naw.” Johnny answers honestly.
“Fair enough. Figured it was worth a shot.” Josh says with his mouth full of pancake.
“I’ve got stuff going on with both girlfriends all week then I have to fly out to Germany to beat some ass. Where the shit do you put all that food?” Johnny asks.
“In my mouth. If I’m supposed to be putting it somewhere different I’m definitely not comfortable doing it in front of you and all these people. I’m going to Germany too ya know.” Josh says after swallowing.
“You aren’t gonna get like…nervous out there?” Johnny asks.
“Why would I be nervous?” Josh responds. There is a long pause.
“Because uh… you know what? I’m not going down this road with you.” Johnny says, sipping on his coffee.
“I’m more likely to run into a Nazi at a house show in Tennessee than in Germany, Johnny. Believe me, I know from experience.” Josh says frankly.
“Fair point. I guess I didn’t think about it that wa-DID YOU SERIOUSLY FINISH ANOTHER PLATE?!?!” Johnny says, slamming his hand on the table. The two of them get a few odd looks.
“Uhm…if I say no would you believe I somehow made pancakes magically disappear?” Josh asks.
“At this point? Probably.” Johnny says.
“How is what possible?” Josh asks, he looks to the waitress who rolls her eyes and puts in an order for another stack.
“Nevermind… so how are things in the UK?” Johnny asks.
“Rad, for the most part. I dunno. Hammerstein used to be really good friends but he seems to have gotten….crazy.” Josh says, lamenting the actions of his old friend and former half of the ‘Jewish Hammers’ tag team.
“It’s the rule of tag teams. 90% of the time one half of the tag team starts to succeed more than the other and jealousy starts to rear its ugly head. It’s unfortunate but that’s typically how shit tends to work out.” Johnny says to his good friend and former wrestling student as he sips on a cup of coffee. Josh’s phone buzzes and he opens it up to read his twitter feed.
“Oh.” Josh says.
‘Oh? Good oh? Bad oh? ” Johnny responds.
“Weird Oh. Hammerstein has been pulled from the match. I’ve been set up with a new opponent.” Josh says.
“That’s probably a bad Oh.” Johnny says as another plate of pancakes is set in front of Josh.
“How do you figure? He’ll get his shot eventually. I’m not backing down from a fight” Josh says as he starts to pour syrup on his pancakes.
“I mean, I get that. Do you really think this situation of all things is going to facilitate a rational response from him? Not a chance, Floofy.” Johnny says.
“Well, I mean… do you wanna fly out with me and watch my back.” Josh asks.
“Fuck naw.” Johnny answers honestly.
“Fair enough. Figured it was worth a shot.” Josh says with his mouth full of pancake.
“I’ve got stuff going on with both girlfriends all week then I have to fly out to Germany to beat some ass. Where the shit do you put all that food?” Johnny asks.
“In my mouth. If I’m supposed to be putting it somewhere different I’m definitely not comfortable doing it in front of you and all these people. I’m going to Germany too ya know.” Josh says after swallowing.
“You aren’t gonna get like…nervous out there?” Johnny asks.
“Why would I be nervous?” Josh responds. There is a long pause.
“Because uh… you know what? I’m not going down this road with you.” Johnny says, sipping on his coffee.
“I’m more likely to run into a Nazi at a house show in Tennessee than in Germany, Johnny. Believe me, I know from experience.” Josh says frankly.
“Fair point. I guess I didn’t think about it that wa-DID YOU SERIOUSLY FINISH ANOTHER PLATE?!?!” Johnny says, slamming his hand on the table. The two of them get a few odd looks.
“Uhm…if I say no would you believe I somehow made pancakes magically disappear?” Josh asks.
“At this point? Probably.” Johnny says.
