Blazer v Storms

[UKWF]

Post your RPs for the match below. 2 RP cap, max. 500 words per RP.

[The Jew Blazer]

THE JEW BLAZER
Origins: Issue Two

"You drive a hard bargain." Josh says, getting on eye level with his ingenious opponent. 

"Fine. You'll get one more, but only if you promise you aren't gonna make this difficult for me. Understood?" Josh asks with all the weight of a police negotiator. His opponent licks his face. 

"Alright, seems like we have a deal." Josh says before he gives the adorable pupper another treat. Content with the deal they've made, the dog remains still while Josh finishes cleaning him.  

"You're so good with them." his mother Martha Goldstein says. Josh smiles. 

"Thanks. He's such a well-behaved little guy...even he is a little greedy." Josh says as he starts rinsing him off. The dog yaps in response. 

"You should go to Veterinarian School." She adds. Josh sighs and rolls his eyes. 

"Oy vey, ma. I'm a wrestler. I'm good at it, too." Josh says. 

"I know, bubbe. I just..." She says. 

"I get it, ma. I know. Look I'm not dad, okay? I'm not going to just leave. I know he must have given you a really bad impression of what this job is but... I'm not going anywhere." Josh says. 

"I know. You're such a good boy, Josh. You're gonna make that fiance of yours very happy." Martha says with a smile. 

"Speaking of which...I need to meet her for lunch then Ronnie and I are gonna work out at the Rec Center. Think you can handle drying him off?" Josh says as the pupper shakes himself dry. 

"Seems he's got it pretty well taken care of." Martha says with a laugh. 

____________________________________

Ronnie had gone home. He was still recovering from his back injury so he couldn't go as long as he used to. Now Josh was alone, slamming the dummy around as much as he could and just generally wearing himself out. He'd had another argument with Kaylee. She had wanted to get a place in California since she had become the GM of West Coast Genesis but even if they were gonna split time between New York and Cali... Josh couldn't leave his mom alone. Also, New York had been his home his whole life. It was in his blood. Ever since his great grandpa came over to escape the 'unpleasantness'. Josh started finally hitting that sweet spot. That spot where he could feed off the fire in his lungs, where the exhaustion and the pain fueled him instead of slowing him down. He picked up the bag and scoop slammed it on the mat before in a single bound leaping to the top rope and jumping off to land on it in an impressive moonsault. Josh was happy with himself. He took off the tie in his hair and his jewfro sprang out. 

"I'm amazed you've gotten as far as you have. Your form is sloppy as hell." A voice says. The voice belonged to a face that Josh had only seen in pictures.  

"...Dad?"  

[The Jew Blazer]

THE JEW BLAZER
The Duck Again

The wrestling press had gathered. Wary of the situation they may have walked into. They all collectively groan when they see The Jew Blazer emerge to the podium wearing a suit jacket with his blue spandex-covered legs and wrestling boots sticking out like Clark Kent forgot to put his pants on one morning and also was a skinny Jewish guy. Several of the wrestling journalists get up and leave.

"Hello members of the press. I've been asked to release a statement about my upcoming match with Hunter Storms. However once again, for contractual reasons I am forced to leave this up to my press secretary so without further ado, allow me to reintroduce you to Mr. Chuck Duckpuppet." The Jew Blazer says. He ducks behind the podium and from behind it rises a puppet of a duck to a sea of sighs and groans.

"I will now be accepting questions on behalf of the Jew Blazer. Quack." Chuck Duckpuppet says.

"Uh...okay. How is The Blazer feeling about his chances against Hunter Storms?" One member of the wrestling press asks.

"The Blazer is very confident given his repeated victories over Mr. Storms and the group formerly known as the New Management Enforcers. Just as I am confident that small bits of bread are delicious. I am a duck. Quack." Chuck Duckpuppet responds.

"This is so...ahem... is it true The Jew Blazer and Hammerstein are at odds a bit?" another member of the press asks while simultaneously asking themselves how their career ended up like this.

"I can assure you that The Jew Blazer and Hammerstein remain the best of friends, but both of them seem to be turning their attentions to the possibility of singles success. Despite this the two of them remain allies and good friends. Should the need for them to pair up arise, they will answer the call just as they did when they assisted in the dismantling of the NME. Also, were you aware that ducks can be found on every continent save for Antarctica? Quack quack." Chuck Duckpuppet says. The reporter facepalms and holds back tears over what their life had become.

"I feel like I can take one more question. Quack." Chuck Duckpuppet says.

"Yes, fine. How long do you think it will take...your client....to win singles gold." The reporter asks.

"The Jew Blazer has sworn he will attain singles gold in 2017. He is on track to winning a title in Redemption but also has his focus on several individuals in UKWF. The Jew Blazer has shown many that he is more than a man in a cape. Just as I am an omnivore which many people aren't aware of. I am a duck. Quack. Thank you for coming." Chuck Duckpuppet says before the frustrated crowd of press members disperses. The Blazer comes out from behind the podium and walks offstage with Chuck, offering him bits of bread for doing such a good job.