Everett & Partner v Gav and Shazza

[UKWF]

Post your RPs for the match below. 2 RP cap, max. 500 words per RP.

[Dave]

"Frankly... I should be the very last person to talk bad about underhanded tactics."

D.C. Wiland starts his promo video behind his kitchen table, mixing himself the drink known as The Old Fashioned.

"I mean, look at my career. The things I'm most famous for are roll-ups, blatant cheating and kicking people in the nuts. Why should I, off all people, be the man who stands up to fight the injustice caused by Gav The Chav and his girlfriend? Apart from the fact that I love travelling to the UK, there's the bigger picture that is friendship."

Wiland takes a first sip of his freshly made drink and smirks happily.

"Seriously," he turns his attention back to the camera. "Even a despicable villain like me cherishes the concept of friendship. And believe me that since I have only a select few of those true friends, I understand that concept like nobody else in the world. Sterling Everett is one of those very special friends."

Deezy takes his drink and moves to a nearby armchair.

"When I first came to the UK and started building an army to conquer FRONTIER, Sterling Everett was the young man that caught my eye when I entered London's Stryke Dojo. There was a ton of guys trying to impress, trying to be the best, flashiest in the world... but Sterling was different. He was brutal, and there was a certain aspect of beauty in his brutality. He was straight to the point, he just wanted to beat his opponent down and leave. That's why I picked him for my group, The Filth, and I made a good choice. He was always loyal, he always had my back and never EVER questioned my decisions. When we parted ways I told him that whatever he's gonna do next... I'll be there for him. And he decided that he wants the UKWF Championship."

He takes another sip.

"With a quick look at the UKWF roster, I can easily say there is noone else deserving of the title more than him. Sterling Everett, to me, is the definition of a modern day heavyweight wrestler. A destructive force that can have a deathclutch on that belt for an entire year if he decides. The problem is, two spoiled stupid kids are blocking the way. Gav the Chav and his girlfriend Shazza are also definitions. Definitions of what is wrong with today's kids. Sure, I'm no grandpa myself, but at the very least I am very well trained for this business. I am not a stupid suburb idiot who just got up from his PS4 and decided that now he wants to play wrestler and spoil the party for the actual superstars of the industry. You are though, Gav and Shazza. But don't worry. I've seen enough Inbetweeners to know that come Second Strike, two idiots like you have ZERO CHANCE of taking home the win."

He raises the glass for a toast and we fade to black.

[Dave]

We join Sterling Everett after his boxing session. He is sat on a bench, sweat pouring down his face as he removes the tapes from his fists.

"So... you people want a bit of a reaction video regarding the complete fuckery we called UKWF Genesis, right?"

He angrily throws the tapes down.

"Hear this then. UKWF is trying pretty fuckin' hard to be the best in the UK. They bring in some pretty good wrestlers, I gotta give it to Mark Storm, Ursula Areano or, well, myself. And then they completely fuck it up by bringing someone who calls himself 'Gav the Chav', and even allow his bird to take part in the whole thing. Way to fuckin' shoot it all down, lads, yeah."

He applauds sarcastically.

"I can easily be a little bitch and cry here about the fact that little spunkstains like Gav are even allowed close to a wrestling ring. But I won't, because I know that partially, the involvement of him and Shazza in the main event is, partially, my fault. As the person who wants to be a flag bearer for British wrestling, I should also play a role of a sort of a... cleaner, if you will. To put it in a way so you, simpler minds, understand - I should have proper fuckin' murdered him in our opening bout."

Sterling wipes the sweat from his forehead.

"I requested a match against the duo for our "Second Strike" show, and I said I would gladly do a handicap match, because I honestly don't consider myself having a handicap against 'competitors' like them. But they wouldn't allow it unless I got a tag partner, and since my original one is nowhere to be seen anymore, I called in my friend and sort of a mentor, Frank Wiland, to join me in on all the fun. And yes, it will be nothing but pure fun. Because this time, I won't... well, me and Frank won't make the mistake of letting Gav the Chav and Shazza walk out of the ring on their own feet and then make fun of the whole thing. No. I get it, Gav, Shazza, you're here to be the comedy reliefs, you're supposed to be funny calling me Raheem Sterling, sure... but this gentleman right here is not in UKWF to have fun. Sterling Everett is a UKWF Champion in the making. For that to come to fruition, I have to remove all the redundant things in this company. That means I got one objective for this weekend..."

Everett stands up and cracks his knuckles.

"I'm gonna have to proper fuckin' murder you."

[UKWF]

The latest video on the UKWF website opens to a close-up shot of Essex's premier wrestling couple - the G-Man and his 'bird', Shazza. As the latter holds whatever device they are using in front of both their faces, Gav pulls out his own iPhone, pointing at the screen.

'Shaz', he asks. ''Oo's that on there?'

Despite not being able to see the screen, which is turned towards the camera, Shazza obediently replies:

'That's me, babe, innit?'

Gav nods. 'Too right it is. An' the thing is, babe...you don't wrestle, do yez?'

'No, babe', Shazza replies, still playing along. 'I don't.'

'Right. So, what I gotta ask is, right?' Gav points out towards the camera. ''Oo the FUCK said me bird could wrestle?'

The chav barely pauses for effect, his face becoming ruddy with anger.

'I don't care what you posh cunts thinks. Me bird ent fightin' no cunt. On Sunday, the G-Man 'ere is gunner be takin' on them two wankers himself.'

This time, there is a longer pause; then, Gav holds his finger out again.

'Sterling...you seen what 'appens when you fuck with da G-Man. You thought you was just gunner beat me up an' call it a night, did yez, ya daft cunt? Well, now you know. When you fuck with the G-Man, you get fucked by the G-Man. An' usually, cunts just give up once they've 'ad their 'eads kick in. But you? Yer even dumber'n most other wankers I beat up. 'Cause now you wanner bring yer mate to fight me? Mate, you ain't even got a clue, does ya?'

Gav snorts in derision.

'Well, 'ere's 'ow it's gunner be, mate, right? On Sunday? I don't give a FUCK 'ow many o' yez there is. I don't care if there's one a' yez, two a'yez, ten a' yez, whatever. You lot wanner go, we're gunner fuckin' go. I'm gunner take on all a' yez, an' I'm gunner bash all yer 'eads in like the bunch o' right cunts you are. An' me bird? Me bird is gunner stand at ringside an' look fuckin' fit. 'Cause that's what she does. She does the glam. It's me what does the slam. An' Sterling...on Sunday...I'm gunner do some slammin'. On you and yer wank-off mates.

Last warnin', mate.'

With this, and after offering the camera another death glare, the self-proclaimed 'hardest man in London' reaches in and switches off the recording device, ending the video.

Final Word Count: 410