UKWF Total Warfare RESULTS!

[UKWF]

About a week after the show was originally due to air, streamers who have been keeping up with the United Kingdom Wrestling Federation's Twitter are treated to the familiar sounds of The Rezillos' 'Somebody's Gonna Get Their Heads Kicked In Tonight', overlaid atop the usual montage of company superstars performing some of their most impactful moves over a Union Jack background. A moment later, the usual title card appears:

UKWF TOTAL WARFARE

From there, the feed cuts to the inside of an Islington Garage that is reasonably well-composed, despite being larger than previous UKWF venues. A sizeable smattering of fans is distributed across the venue's two floors, and the camera catches some of their signs:

I CAME FOR THE BALLSPLEX

RUPERT AND NIGEL VOTED 'LEAVE'

#WARGAMES 

As this latest sign becomes visible, the camera pans over to show the steel structure for the night's Main Event, currently suspended above the stage, where the ring is set up. From there, the feed cuts to a worried-looking duo of announcers gazing up at the structure:

Kerry Buckingham: ...do you reckon it will fall, darling?

Barry Jones: Nah...reckon we're safe, luv.

The cockney announcer turns to the camera:

Baz: Evenin', folks! I'm Baz Jones, 'ere with the lovely Kerry Buckingham, an' welcome to the UKWF show tha' almost didn' 'appen!

Kerry: Ugh, don't remind me, darling...what a nightmare!

Baz: We 'ad some issues with schedulin', bu' in the end, bettah late than nevah, eh, Kerr?

Kerry: Quite. Shame the card did not improve in the week since...

Baz: Wo'd'yer mean?! Bang-up card, this is! Ya go' them two lasses fightin' them poshie boys...

Kerry: ...also known as the only good match of the night...

Baz: You 'ave them three gels facin' them other three gels in this 'ere thing above our 'eads...an' three other crackin' matches, innit?

Kerry: You, darling, are easily satisfied. I, on the other hand, am more demanding. As far as I am concerned, this is a one-match card, and that just so happens to be the one we will be seeing first!

Baz: Well, I can't wait f'r any of 'em! 

Kerry seems poised to add a few more choice thoughts, but before she can do so, the feed cuts to a video package!

[UKWF]

The pre-match video package does a good job of conveying the rivalry between happy-go-lucky fan-favourites Team PRD and the cocky Best of British. From the boys' intentional walk-out on their first encounter to their intentional disqualification on the second, to James Kensington placing both teams in a no-disqualification match, the story is told simply and succintly. The whole is boosted by particularly impactful quotes from both sides, giving viewers a good idea of the rivalry heading into the match at hand!

No-DQ: The Best of British v Team PRD

The match begins with Rupert and Nigel rushing Team PRD with chairs before they are even done making their entrance. The two girls go down, and the lads high-five one another, congratulating themselves for a job well done. They then reach down and go to pick up the groggy girls again...only to find Meiko has kept the microphone she has used for her entrance firmly clutched! Static comes out of the arena speakers and the fans in attendance cover their ears as Meiko lands one good microphone shot to the head of Rupert! The blond staggers back, causing his partner to momentarily lose focus as he whips his head round to see what is occurring. Junko similarly profits from this distraction, ramming her head into the larger man's stomach and causing him to tumble backwards as well! The two women exchange a look and a nod, and promptly launch into a double-dropkick, laying their opponents out!

With the fans cheering wildly, the two cast aside their microphones and slide into the ring, voluntarily choosing not to follow up on their advantage. As such, the two men have time to get to their feet, regroup, pick up their chairs and approach the ring, smug smirks on their faces...

...which are quickly wiped out as May and June both leap over the ropes with gorgeous double suicide dives! Nigel and Rupert are alert enough, however, to hold up their chairs, and the crowd gasps as the two joshi's backs connect with the steel!

The two men in the Best of British once again exchange high-fives as they pick up their opponents and roll them into the ring. This time, they give neither May nor June time to react, as they slip in after them and promptly begin punishing them with chair shots. The crowd rains down boos as the two men go to town on their pop-idol opponents, only stopping when the two chairs have turned into deformed lumps of steel. Nigel then slips out to retrieve some other form of weapon, as Rupert leans in and brings Meiko to her feet for a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, which floors her. Then, as Nigel retrieves two more steel chairs and slides them into the ring, he goes to pick up Junko.

With the second PRD member in his grasp, Rupert signals for Nigel to lift up Meiko. His partner promptly obliges, and the two deliver simultaneous jumping cutters to the girls, faceplanting them onto the steel chairs! The crowd showers them with deafening boos for this, but the two do not seem to mind in the slightest, and pose cockily for the crowd.

After a moment of posing, the two once again motion to pick up their quarries. They throw them towards the ropes, then connect with stereo superkicks on the rebound. As the two women fall limply to the mat yet again, Rupert motions for Nigel to get up on the top rope. He walks over to retrieve the steel chairs, then positioms the girls next to one another and slides a steel chair underneath each of them. As he does so, Nigel has time to reach the top turnbuckle and, at a sign from Rupert, dive off with a 450 splash...

….WHICH MISSES!!!! May and June are somehow aware enough to each roll one way, leaving a clearing of bare steel for Nigel to flop directly onto!!!

The Brit lets out a cry, as his distraught partner watches with his hands on his head. As Nigel crashes and burns, May is just about able to roll out of the ring, but June is not so lucky; an enraged Rupert walks over to pick her up and prepares to deliver his trademark Silver Spoon. She surprises him, however, by reversing the move into her own finisher, a ranhei!!! The Cover Shot connects, and Rupert gets thrown onto his still-prone partner!

June, however, does not cover; instead, she searches around for her own tag team partner, a concerned look on her features. She quickly spots May on the outside and gestures for her to return to the ring. Seeing the coast is clear, the second PRD member promptly does, and June goes up on the top rope. May positions herself underneath her and gives her a boost, throwing her onto the two downed men with a Rocket Launcher! Rupert rolls off Nigel as the joshi lands on him, and June hooks the leg!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

And technical underdogs PRD grab a weapon-less victory in the opening match!

WINNERS in 6:32: Team PRD

No sooner have the joshi won the match, however, than they are accosted by the Best of British's newest allies, the Divas of Dominance! Jessie and Jamie Alexander, along with Kelly Garrett, invade the ring and begin to lay into the hapless PRD, who can do little more than defend themselves and are clearly on the back foot.

Just as all seems lost, however, a last-minute lifeline appears in the form of the Australian-American Connection!! Valerie and a reluctant Oscar slide into the ring and engage the dastardly Divas, giving PRD a much appreciated respite! A brawl then ensues, which quickly spills outside the ring as well, as all six men and women trade punches. Officials are called in to intervene, and manage to separate the brawlers long enough to lead them backstage, leaving the EMTs to stretcher out the unconscious Rupert and Nigel.

[UKWF]

Shortly after the Best of British have been stretchered out, “Riot” hits the arena and almost every fan in the arena begins cheering as Skylynn Reed steps out from behind the curtain, her UKWF Championship resting proudly on her shoulder. A large smile is spread across her face as she makes her way to the ring. She passes the outstretched hands that pawed at her hoody before eventually sliding into the ring. Sky holds the championship above her head as she reaches for a microphone, then waits for everyone to quiet down.

Skylynn Reed: “So, Monday was my birthday. Turned eighteen, and it…”

The young Aussie is interrupted by chants of “Happy Birthday!”. She looked down at the mat with a small grin, waiting for the rowdy crowd to quiet itself.

Skylynn Reed: “Like I was saying… Hitting eighteen made me realize something. I stand here, in the middle of this ring, UKWF Champion, and I won it before I turned eighteen. I’ve fought against and beat some of the best professional wrestlers that I can get into a ring with. I’ve done a lot before I’d even be considered an “adult”. I’ve loved, I’ve hated, damn near lost my life and career. All before eighteen.”

She paused to walk forward, leaning against the ring ropes with a smile.

Skylynn Reed: “A lot of people don’t experience what I have in a life time, but here I am.”

A round of applause from the crowd caused Sky to hold her championship up above her head. She paced around the ring smiling, once again waiting for the fans to settle down. 

Skylynn Reed: “No thanks to any of you.”

Her smile turned into a look of disgust, the people in attendance falling silent.

Skylynn Reed: “No thanks to ANY of you. No thanks to ANYONE backstage, no thanks to ANYONE who I competed with in GPW. NONE of you helped me get here. You clap, and cheer, some of you have raised my hand and given me congratulations…

But I did this! ME! Not any of you. I CLAWED MY WAY HERE! I’m the one who fought! I’m the one who bled! I’m CHAMPION because I’m the BEST! You people who cling to me like I’m some sort of hero, I DON’T CARE! You make me sick. I didn’t win this for you, or your stupid ass children like so many of you seem to think. I did this for ME. I did this to show everyone that I belong, once and for all.”

Her words are finally starting to sink in with the crowd, who began booing and chanting various derogatory phrases.

Skylynn Reed: “SHUT THE HELL UP WHEN I’M TALKING!”

She stood silent in the middle of the ring as the crowd continued ripping on her. She waited, tapping her foot as the seconds passed by, before bringing the microphone back to her lips.

Skylynn Reed: “You sit there, chugging your drinks, acting like somehow NOW you’re better than me. Like I’ve lowered myself to some unspeakable level. But the truth is, and I’ll say it nice and slow if you or anyone else is too stupid to understand what I’m saying….

I. Am. Better. Than. You. I’m better than your new favorite wrestler! Whether that be Ursula or any of the other people who just weren’t good enough to stand here as your UKWF Champion. Everyone sitting backstage is irrelevant. I’m the only one here who matters now becuase I EARNED IT! And if you don’t like it, too damn bad. If anyone back there doesn’t like it, step up to the plate and try to bat against a queen, but you’ll strike out time and time again.” 

Even more boos rain down from the audience, but this does little to deter the champ this time.

Skylynn Reed: “You can vilify me! You’d do it eventually anyway. You’re such a fickle bunch. You take YOUR heroes time and time again and break them down when the cool new thing arrives. Not this time. Not with me. I’m taking control of ME, you people barely deserve to sit on your asses while I’m present.. Keep that in mind when I’m standing here each show, with this championship on my shoulder. Remember how LUCKY you are that you’re able to bare witness to me putting this company on my back. 

I’m out.”

The jeers continue as she drops the microphone, “Riot” once again playing as she quickly slides under the bottom rope. Skylynn once again holds her title high above her head, a more devious grin coming to her lips as she walks backstage.

Baz: That gel's gone mental!

Kerry: ...or perhaps she simply wised up, darling.

Baz, however, is still clearly befuddled and blinking in confusion as another theme song hits the speakers, turning the fans' jeers to boos. Another match is about to begin!

[UKWF]

Blaise Fader v Noah Fox

Before the match, Fox mouths off to Blaise about her humble origins. Fader tries to shrug it off at first, letting her good nature speak loudest, but eventually, Fox's heckles get to her, and the one-percenter gets the reaction he desired: Blaise engages him with punches, in a blind rage. So angry is she, however, that she falls prey to a single-leg takedown from Fox! She lands on her back on the mat, and Fox begins attempting to set up some sort of follow-up submission move. Blaise, however, uses her free leg to kick at him, making him reel just enough to where she can return to her feet.

She barely has time to roll over and get to one knee, however, before Fox is back on offence, The one-percenter hits an enzuigiri, and Blaise goes down again. Fox covers!

ONE!

...Kickout!

Fox's expression makes his disappointment clear, but still he keeps up his momentum. He brings Blaise to her feet and applies a rear mat slam, rolling into another cover.

ONE!

...Kickout!

Fox once again lets his frustration show, this time through a primal scream. Still, he maintains his focus, bringing Blaise to her feet and setting her up for a reverse bulldog. Blaise, however, reacts faster, getting behind Fox and reversing her predicament into a German suplex attempt! The move lands, and Blaise bridges it!

ONE!

TW—Kickout!

Unlike Fox, Blaise reacts with only a shrug as she rolls off the top of her opponent and leans in to pick him up yet again. She flings him to the ropes, and connects on the rebound with the Exocet big boot! Down goes Fox, as Blaise covers!

ONE!

TWO!

---Kickout!

Once again, Blaise reacts calmly to the kickout, not demonstrating in any way, and simply leaning in to pick up Fox. She takes a couple of steps back, so that she may be aligned with the turnbuckle, and sets him up for her Fade Away alley oop facebuster! Fox tries to fight it, but to no avail, as the move connects, and he is sent into the corner! Rather than cover, however, Blaise takes a few steps back, raising a hand to the cheering crowd before taking off running and connecting with the Rocka Rolla! The cannonball senton connects, and Blaise pulls Fox away from the turnbuckle, preparing to cover...

...and this is when a figure comes streaking from the back, steel chair in hand, taking Fader's attention away from her opponent! Blaise wastes no time sliding out of the ring to intercept Juliet Black, and is successful in dodging her chair shot. Juliet turns around swiftly, but just a moment too late, as she gets swept up onto Blaise's back! She drops the steel chair, but thinks on her toes and manages to slip out of the rack predicament and reverse it into an attempted snap clit-plex. Blaise is once again quicker, however, \and reverses the predicament into a side slam...ONTO the chair Juliet had brought with her! The cheers reach fever pitch as Blaise nods to herself once, acknowledging a job well done, and prepares to return to the ring, where the referee has reached the count of SIX!

As his opponent fought her rival on the outside, however, Fox has had time to recover from Blaise's flurry of attacks, and hatched a plan. As the heavyset fan-favourite returns to the ring, she is therefore met by an opponent firmly perched on the top rope and ready to dive off. A moment later, Fox dives off with his top rope double stomp, the Cash Drop, aiming to hit Fader in the head...

...only for her to sidestep! Fox thus lands feet-first on the concrete, and stumbles around, grimacing. Seeing her chance, Blaise sweeps him up into a rack position and delivers her spin-out Argentine powerbomb on the floor! The Argentine blitz connects, but the referee has, by this point, reached the count of eight and, unable to pin, Blaise is forced to bring her opponent up and place him on the apron. She then rolls him into the ring, before showing herself in. No sooner has she entered than she drops down and covers, for what is at this point a formality.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

And Blaise Fader's good run of form steamrolls on with another impressive win!

WINNER in 6:15: Blaise Fader

[UKWF]

Blaise is still celebrating – and, on the outside, Juliet is shaking off the cobwebs – when the sudden appearance of a familiar figure on the ramp makes the cheers escalate even more in volume.

Baz: Bloomin' 'eck! It's the gaffer!

As he walks out, however, James Kensington only barely acknowledges the welcome. He seems far more focused on the competitors both inside and outside the ring, and his eyes are sparking dangerously as he requests a microphone from a nearby stage hand. He then gestures for the crowd to simmer down, a gesture which is promptly obeyed, leaving him the room to speak up.

James Kensington: For weeks now, I have sat back and watched these two young women engage one another, in the hope they might sort out their own issues and peace might be restored. Clearly, that is not to be,

James's piercing gaze focuses on Blaise first, then Juliet.

James Kensington: I therefore feel it necessary, as the provisional General Manager of this organisation, to take matters into my own hands.

He pauses, once again studying one girl, then the other.

James Kensington: In two weeks, when UKWF next holds an event, the headliner match of the night will see Blaise Fader take on Juliet Black in what I am told is a popular way to solve this sort of contest: a two out of three falls match!

The crowd at the Islington Garage explode, as a determined look comes across both women's faces. Juliet immediately begins mouthing off to Blaise, who looks poised to respond; however, a few commanding words from James cut them both off.

James Kensington: Apologies, ladies, I am not yet done.

Silence is once again restored, albeit begrudgingly, and James is able to add:

James Kensington: And seeing as certain people have taken it upon themselves to be vocal about being better than everyone else in this company...I thought I might test that theory out as well. I am thereby implementing an additional stipulation to this contest. Whoever emerges victorious from it shall be declared the number one contender to the UKWF Championship!

The volume inside the Islington Garage reaches fever pitch, as the determined expression returns to both women's faces. Juliet immediately begins to mouth off yet again, but this time, James does not interrupt her; instead, he simply wishes the two women good luck before retreating up the ramp.

Baz: Bloody 'ell! Big news, that, innit?! Wha' a cracker we'll be 'avin' in two weeks! And these gels will finally get to sort their lot out!

Kerry seems poised to say something, but finds words eluding her; Baz's excited comment is, therefore, the last thing heard before the next match begins!

[UKWF]

Jay Kingsley V. Holden Wagner 

The bell rings, and with the two competitors in the ring similar in size and stature, it's clear the match will come down to aerial versus technical skill. Wagner, not bothering to even lock up with the lighter Kingsley, simply and abruptly shoves him away, marching toward him aggressively while he jukes and dodges out of the way on nimble feet. Holden, however, uses his reach to snatch Jay into a tight headlock. Kingsley squeezes out, but his opponent quickly recovers his grip, this time transitioning from the headlock with a front facelock. Before Wagner can make anything of it, however, Kingsley sneaks out once again, this time ducking back toward his opponent low to sweep out his legs, sending his back to the mat. With his opponent floored, Kingsley looks to stomp him out like a cigarette butt, but Wagner catches his boot and lifts his own to kick him away. He quickly recovers, and the stare down between two evenly-matched opponents continues. 

Some trash talk is exchanged between the two egocentrics, and the spry Kingsley quickly picks up on what he can do to overwhelm his opponent. Once again, he keeps his distance, using his agility to duck under every swinging arm or grasping hand Holden tries to throw at him. Holden, growing impatient, rebounds off the ropes to match his speed, and looks to take Kingsley down with a sharp Clothesline - but Kingsley slides under Wagner's legs, launching a series of quick, mean kicks to his lower legs, bringing the American down to his knees. Kingsley mocks Wagner with some more hurtful words, and mimicking what his opponent had tried to do to get him in his predicament, rebounds off the ropes for a harder kick to the midsection - but Wagner catches him with a stunning uppercut from his knees, sending Kingsley reeling, clutching his nose. 

With his opponent distracted, Wagner bounds up, jerking him around and Irish Whipping him into the ropes. 

Kingsley rebounds - Wagner ducks. 

Kingsley rebounds again, and Wagner goes for another Clothesline - but Kingsley leapfrogs him! 

Kingsley rebounds for a third time, and hits Wagner with a fierce Dropkick! He scrambles over for the easy cover! 

One! 

... 

Wagner kicks out! 

Clearly frustrated, Kingsley turns to the ropes to aid him once again - but a quickly-recovered Holden trips his legs out from under him, sending him crashing to the mat. Picking himself up, Wagner stomps on the back of Kingsley's legs and back, receiving a stern warning from the referee, who he eagerly tells where he can put his officiating. While this bicker-session has gone on, Jay's popped back up, and he takes Wagner down with a Clothesline of his own, nearly taking out the referee in the process! 

The referee, catching himself on the ropes, turns to chastise Kingsley's reckless actions as well, which Kingsley takes as well as one might expect... but from his low position, Holden takes advantage with a sneaky roll-up attempt! 

One! 

... 

Two--Kingsley kicks out! 

While he might have saved himself from a near-fall, that doesn't mean Jay's out of the woods quite yet, and Wagner teaches him through example with a kick to the back of the head. With the high-flyer grounded once again, Wagner looks to the ropes himself, bounding toward the second rope and launching himself back with a Springboard Moonsault! All Holden connects with is the harsh mat, however, when Kingsley rolls forward out of harm's way at the last second. 

Picking himself up, a dazed Wagner turns toward Kingsley... who handsprings himself backward from his tucked roll, and locks his legs around him for a Handspring Hurricanrana! Wagner tumbles to the mat again, taken by surprise. Jay looks to capitalize, climbing to the top rope for a Moonsault of his own - but Wagner wisely rolls out of the way--only to be caught by a Standing Corkscrew Senton! 

Kingsley covers, cockily counting along with the ref! 

One! 

... 

Two! 

... 

Wagner gets the shoulder up! 

Kingsley is appalled by his opponents' resilience in the face of his acrobatics, and jabs him right in the throat for his troubles. Recovering, he picks Wagner up, looking for a Sitout Suplex Slam to keep him down... but Wagner breaks his fall with his feet, keeping hold of Kingsley as he turns himself around and hauls Jay up for a Vertical Suplex of his own... and drops into a Powerbomb! It's the Royal Flush! 

One! 

... 

Two! 

... 

Thr--Kingsley kicks out! 

Wagner, enraged, rises to his feet to shout down the referee once again, flashing him three fingers to the official's explanation of a two count, before flashing one middle finger his way. Incensed, Wagner turns back to the still-floored Kingsley, rolling him onto his front side and picking him up for a Pumphandle Slam. With the wind out of his sails, Kingsley can't sneak out of this one - he's dropped on his back again! 

Running a hand through his long hair, Wagner's had enough for one match. Nodding assuredly to the audience, Wagner comes down to the flattened Kingsley's level, and traps him in the devastating California Crossface! With the submission locked in, it's only a matter of time before the cocky Brit taps out... 

... but as Kingsley struggles, Wagner begins to wince and flinch in pain as well! It's not long after that he breaks the submission hold, clutching his wrist. 

"He bit me! He fuckin' bit me!" 

Complaining to the referee, Wagner doesn't notice Kingsley go for the ropes again, and springboard off to catch him with a Springboard Cutter--except Wagner does, and catches him out of the air, stopping him dead in his tracks! 

"Wanna fly high?" Wagner barks into a defenseless Kingsley's face. "I'll teach you to fly high!" 

Dragging him to his feet, Wagner Irish Whips Kingsley toward the ropes, and with little time to spare, leaps up and hits him with his own finishing maneuever, Straight Outta Brixton! 

Well, sort of! 

While the two collide with the ground after the Front Flip DDT, it's clear that Wagner didn't get all of it, as he rolls off as well, clutching his head in pain while Kingsley appears to be out cold. The referee, unsure of the situation, checks on both competitors, hesitant to throw up the X. Luckily for him, Holden is the first to stir, crawling over to Kingsley once again to make the cover. 

One! 

... 

Two! 

... 

Three! 

WINNER in 10:09: Holden Wagner 

Holden rises to his feet, but only with the ref's assistance, who raises his arm before being shoved away by the victor, clutching his head once again as he slinks back up the ramp. That'll teach him to try and steal a finisher that flashy...

[UKWF]

The crowd is still recovering from the last match when the theme song to 'Match of the Day' comes on through the arena speakers, immediately generating boos from the crowd. These only intensify as Gav the Chav steps out onto the platform, seconded as always by his blonde eye candy, Shazza Jade. The two take a moment to snatch a microphone from a nearby stage hand before heading down to the ring. No sooner has Gav entered it – Shazza taking her usual position on the outside – than the microphone is to his lips and he is spewing out:

Gav: Alrite you cunts?!

The crowd reacts angrily to the slur, but the council flat hero pays it no mind, instead powering through the hate:

Gav: So I 'eard London wants to leave the UK 'cos o' that refeyendum thing, innit?

The crowd gives a loud, positive reaction, causing Gav to smirk:

Gav: Well, I reckon tha''s a load o' old shite!

The boos promptly return as Gav turns to his better half:

Gav: Shaz, tell this lot why you're votin' out of the EU refeyendum!

Shazza wastes no time obliging:

Shazza: Well, first of all, I won't 'ave to watch the Euros next year, the football, 'cos England won't be in it. Second, right, I don't 'ave to buy them six packs of eggs down at the local Co-Op...if I want, I can go to Farmer John an' get some good eggs, from good British chickens, right? 

Gav: Too right! We don' need no fuckin' EU sendin' no fuckin' foreign bastards over 'ere an' tellin' us what to do!

This further riles up the crowd, who are now showering the couple with jeers. Gav therefore has to struggle to make himself heard as he continues:

Gav: Take this company, right?! Me mates wanner come down an' 'rassle, an' they can't, 'cos all it is is foreign buggers stealin' their jobs! It's not fuckin' on, is it?!

Even more boos ensue, and Gav has to practically shout:

Gav: IN FACT...in fact, I dare any o' you foreign cunts in the back to come out 'ere an' show me why you lot are so much better than us British boys! G'wan then! Anyone got the bollocks?! I'm gonna be waitin' right 'ere!

For a moment, it appears Gav's challenge will go unanswered, and he will get the moral victory; just as he and Shazza are leaving the ring, however – smirking to one another smugly – an unknown man comes running out of the back at full tilt, throwing his shirt off as he slides into the ring! Gav barely has time to put his dukes up before the other man is whaling away at him, to the delight of the crowd!

[UKWF]

Gav The Chav vs ??

The smaller man starts off with fire, backing Gav to the ropes with punches. Caught off guard, the chav takes a moment to regroup, but eventually manages to even things out, and the two trade punches until Gav is able to sneak in an eye poke. As the small man loses composure for a brief second, Gav profits, nailing him with a kick to the stomach and landing a facebuster. With his opponent down, he begins to repeatedly kick the shorter man in the ribs, yelling 'COME ON, SHORT ARSE!' This, in turn, prompts the crowd to begin a chant:

'LET'S GO SHORT ARSE! *clapclap clapclap clap* LET'S GO SHORT ARSE!'

Gav seems bothered by this, and begins to yell at the stands, a mission in which he is helped by his girlfriend. Somehow, however, he does not let this distract him from his mission, and he goes about picking up the newly christened 'Short Arse'. He flings him towards the ropes, looking to connect on the rebound, and is surprised when the small man grabs onto the ropes instead. Undaunted, Gav runs at him with a clothesline...

...only for the man to duck and reverse it into a back body drop! Gav takes a tumble over the ropes, and straight onto Shazza, who goes down!

This does get the Chav's attention away from the match for a long moment, as he checks on his beloved. Short Arse, on the other hand, sees his chance, and vaults over the ropes onto Gav! The move connects, and the Chav goes down, but the two men are laid out for a long moment thereafter! The referee starts a count!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

FOUR!

Both men begin to stir!

FIVE!

Short Arse is on his feet!

SIX!

Gav stumbles to his feet, as his opponent rolls in and heads for the turnbuckle!

SEVEN!

Gav stumbles towards the apron, dazed!

EIGHT!

Gav rolls into the ring, almost mechanically. He pulls himself to his feet...

...and the newcomer launches off the top with a beautiful crossbody! He lands on Gav, and quickly hooks a leg!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

And 'Short Arse' shows Gav why foreigners are valuable!

WINNER in 03:02: 'Short Arse'

[UKWF]

As the referee leans in to raise his hand, 'Short Arse' profits from the opportunity to pull himself up to his feet. He looks around at the cheering crowd, and a smile broaches his features. He then requests, and is given, a microphone, which he uses to address the crowd, with a distinctly American accent.

Man: We sure taught 'em, huh?!

The fans give a cheer, making the man's smile widen.

Man: Thanks for the welcome, guys. I'm glad to be here. And now that I'm done teaching this dude here some manners...I guess I should show some manners of my own an' introduce myself!

A chant of 'SHORT ARSE, SHORT ARSE, SHORT ARSE' arises, bringing a chuckle from Barry:

Baz: That's yer name now, lad!

The man, however, seems intent on giving the fans his real name, which he does after another moment:

Man: My name's not Short Arse. My name's TYSON TURBO! And I'm here to give the UK a li'l bit of TURBO POWER!!!

With this, the man throws an arm up in the air briefly, before handing his microphone back to a stage hand. He then makes his way to the back, soaking up the cheers of the crowd.

Baz: Seems the crowd likes this feller...what d'yer reckon, Kerr?

Kerry: Ugh...! Just what we needed! Another peppy idiot!

Baz seems poised to intercede, but before he can, yet another theme song has the crowd on their feet!

[UKWF]

Juliet Black v Ursula Areano

As the match begins, Juliet is still showing some effects from her run-in with Blaise earlier in the night. Ursula is therefore able to gain the upper hand, and connect with a series of punches to Juliet's head. In this manner, she pins the Queen of the Ring to the corner. She goes for a handspring splash, but Juliet dodges and reverses into a German suplex. Ursula goes flying over, and Juliet bails to the outside, still feeling the effects of Blaise's move from earlier.

As she slides back in the ring, Ursula is waiting. She runs to the ropes, bounces off, and connects with a flying forearm smash! She covers!

ONE!

--Kickout!

Ursula does not lose composure. She brings Juliet to her feet and hits a jumping neckbreaker, into another cover!

ONE!

TWO!

--Kickout!

Ursula brings Juliet to her feet again, preparing to set up another move...but this is where the Queen of the Ring shows the sort of tricks she has up her sleeve. She spits her gum into Ursula's face, making her reel, and quickly capitalises with some very stiff knife-edge chops. In this manner, she manages to back Ursula up to the ropes, and appears to be in total control.

Suddenly, however, Areano fights back! A punch lands on Juliet! And another! And another! The crowd at the Islington Garage explode as the Queen of Lucha takes the fight to her opponent! Finally, with Juliet apparently dazed, Ursula cocks her fist back, looking for the Fist of Fury...

...and gets her eyes raked by the Queen of The Ring! 

This, evidently, throws her off balance, and Juliet therefore has the chance to shout out her favourite phrase:

CLITPLEX!!!!

The move connects a moment later, though not flush. It appears to take a toll out of Juliet as well, and as a result, both women lie on the mat for a long moment.

Eventually, both women begin to stir. Ursula reaches for the nearby ropes and pulls herself up, while Juliet does the same on the other side. The Queen of the Ring then turns and runs at her opponent...only to get floored by a float-over DDT, as Ursula deftly evades whatever the Irishwoman had planned! Juliet hits the mat once again, and Ursula covers!

ONE!

TWO!

--Kickout!!

Ursula rolls through to her feet, and appears to be making up her mind. She brings Juliet to her feet and goes to set up an Argentine cutter...only for the Queen of the Ring to fight back with a series of punches! In this way, Juliet is able to back Ursula to the corner, where she unleashes the Violence Party! The series of punches, forearms, chops and headbutts takes its toll, and Ursula slumps to the ground.

Seeing her opening, Juliet promptly drapes her opponent around her shoulders and begins to ascent the turnbuckle. The intent is clear – to land some form of top rope manouevre – but ends up backfiring, as Ursula comes to and is able to push her off. Down to the mat goes Juliet, and Ursula Areano suddenly finds herself in prime position for her finisher! Seeing her chance, the Argentinian promptly turns around and takes off with Death from Above...

...only to find nobody home!

The crowd groans in sympathy as Juliet rolls out of the way of the move and Ursula crashes and burns! As for the Irishwoman, she has no time to commiserate; she pulls herself up with the help of the nearby ropes and once again walks over to Ursula. She reaches in, grabs both her opponent's arms, pulls back so Ursula's head is off the mat, and delivers a brutal Curb Stomp! The Blackout connects, and Juliet covers!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

And the Queen of the Ring steals a win over the Queen of Lucha!

WINNER in 06:32: Juliet Black

[UKWF]

Before the main event of the night is set to begin, viewers are taken on a journey which begins with Gaia Galanos arriving at UKWF and being introduced by her former allies, the Master Sisters. From there, they are taken through the Masters' attack on their former GPW colleague, Gaia's match with Moonlight Master, the Greek's unlikely alliance with Night Train Ayano, then Sophia Halter, and finally, the inconclusive tag match pitting the two teams against one another, which ended in a double count-out. Snippets of James Kensington making the evening's main event conclude a highly effective recap package, which perfectly sets the mood for the match at hand!

3-on-3 WarGames Match: Hunt By Night & Sophia Halter v The Master Sisters

Our main event starts with The Master Sisters walking to the ring and being locked in their cells, followed by Hunt By Night in opposite sides. A couple minutes pass to get some suspense before the reveal of the first two entrants: Aurora Master and Gaia Galanos. Aurora looks quite worried as both of them are let into the WarGames cage. Once they get to the center of the ring, Gaia and Aurora go for a lock, but at the last minute Aurora retreats. Gaia starts following her as Aurora starts running, it takes a couple seconds, but eventually Gaia grabs Aurora and throws her back with a German Suplex. Aurora rolls and gets up clearly dizzy and starts running away again, but not for long before getting caught into another German suplex, this time Gaia doesn’t let go as she hits with two more. Aurora still tries to escape from Gaia’s claws again, but Gaia gets on top of her quickly and locks the Galanos Clutch. She manages to hold it for a while and it seems for a second that Aurora is going to submit before her partners have time to get involved, but Gaia suddenly releases the lock with a scream. The audience is confused by a second, but the blood coming out of Aurora’s mouth, still on the ground, and Gaia’s arm makes it clear that Aurora decided to bite her way out of the lock. 

Gaia, not one to linger on such a thing very long, tries to grab Aurora, but Aurora rolls out of the ring. Galanos follows her out of the ring, but Aurora just runs away from her. Gaia, against her better judgement, pursues her. Aurora slides into the ring as Aurora continues to evade Gaia, the countdown begins on the UKWF Tron.

3…

2…

1…

The buzzer sounds as the officials on the outside unlock Night Train’s and Carnival’s cells, releasing them into the main cage. Carnival immediately slides under the ring, to the amazement of Aurora, who is now looking at two opponents. It’s not long before Carnival pops from the other side with a chair in hand. At this point, Aurora had been caught by a hurricanrara from Night Train as she entered, and was back in the hands of Gaia again. Carnival jumped in the ring and hit Night Train with a massive chair shot. Meanwhile, Aurora somehow squirms her way out of Gaia’s grasp only for Carnival to catch her with a chairshot to the head too, flooring her. Oddly, Carnival tosses the chair out of the ring causing it to bounce off the cell and to the bit of floor on the outside. Aurora and Carnival get into a small argument that Carnival shrugs off and both of them leave the ring, just to return with more weapons. Aurora brings a table and Carnival brings a baseball bat covered in barbed wire. Aurora sets up the table as Carnival tries to keep the other two down with the weapon. When she finishes, both of them drag Night Train over the table and get on top of opposite sides of the ring corners. They scream a bit more to each other before Aurora jump in one side with a Moonsault and Carnival jump in the other with a Shooting Star Press, hitting perfectly the Yin Yang on Night Train. It takes a toll on them though as they struggle to get up and by the time they do Gaia is already waiting for them, throwing Aurora to the ground with a Belly-to-Belly Suplex and then administers a perfect Exploder Suplex to Carnival. She gets on top of Carnival and attempts to lock in a Cross Armbar, Aurora goes to pull Gaia off, but, with one hand, Gaia shoves her off as she drops backwards into the Cross Armbar causing Carnival to yelp. Aurora looks around and grabs one of the chairs, decided to use it to make Gaia let go of her sister, but at the last second Gaia releases the armbar and rolls out of the way and Aurora hits a hard chair shot right into her sister. Aurora looks shocked at the result of her attack for only a second, but that second is enough for Gaia to grab her and catch her off-guard with an inverted T-Bone Suplex! That’s when the last countdown begins:

3…

2…

1!

Now, Moonlight and Sophia, for their respective teams, are released from their cells into the main cage. Galanos zeroes in on Moonlight as she gets into the ring. Sophia goes directly for Aurora as she’s getting up. And, Night Train and Carnival are already brawling one another while getting to their feet, trading shots as they do. Sophia starts punching Aurora aggressively, but the matron sister manages to escape and roll outside, Sophia goes after her and a race starts. Inside the ring, Carnival and Night Train are putting on a show for everyone, both run to the ropes, Night Train goes for a body slam, but Carnival slides below her. Ayano rolls, landing perfectly and then climbs the ropes. When Carnival gets up she gets hit by a hurrincanrara, but lands on her feet as well, there’s a small staredown and then both go for the ropes again, Night Train gets on top of them again and, when Carnival runs towards her, she goes for a Moonsault, but Carnival reveals she had grabbed her baseball bat and hits Ayano in the belly. 

Moonlight and Gaia had been watching this, but when they realise Dawn’s plan both of them move, Gaia to help her friend, and Moonlight to stop Gaia. The sister grabs Galanos from behind, trying to get a German suplex, but Gaia counters and tries to hit one of her own. Moonlight escapes by hitting her in the face with the elbow and both of them get into a lock which is won by the fresher woman, Moonlight, who hits a front suplex. She doesn’t plan to let Gaia recuperate, but her plan is ruined when Aurora slides in the ring followed by Sophia, and Sophia actually turns her attention from the older sister to hit a running dropkick on Moonlight causing her to stumble backwards. Gaia rolls her up into a school boy style position then comes up into an ankle lock, forcing Moonlight to turn over. Gaia doesn’t have time to completely anchor the ankle lock though before Carnival comes up behind her and strikes her across the back with the baseball bat, forcing her to release the hold! Carnival continues to strike her, while Aurora stomps Night Train to keep her down. Dawn goes to hit Sophia as well, but she ducks and hits Carnival in the face with a kick, making her fall and let go of the bat. Halter immediately grabs the bat and hits Aurora with a hard hit, making her fall out of the ring, bleeding. She turns back and hits Carnival again a couple of times before leaving the ring, probably to punish Aurora some more, but she seemly forgot the younger sister, who gets up and grabs the bat, there’s a small tug of war between them but Moonlight takes the bat and throws it out of the ring. Sophia takes no time to try to hit Moonlight with a punch, but the Master sister grabs her and throws her outside as well. 

Gaia stumbles back to her feet before Moonlight notices. When the largest Master sister turns to face her, she sends a Roundhouse Kick toward Moonlight’s head, showing surprising flexibility! It doesn’t hit its mark though! Moonlight blocks it then grabs the leg over her shoulder then uses her other arm to push Gaia up and drop her with a sickening Sitout Powerbomb! The crowd groans at the thunderous impact. That’s when Night Train suddenly comes into the ring and rushes at Moonlight, still sitting in the sitout position, looking to hit a Shining Wizard! NO! Moonlight lays back then pushes Gaia out of the “pinfall” position and rolls to her feet.

Night Train, realizing Moonlight is stalking behind her, springboards off the ropes and goes for a flying move only to be brought crashing down with a Spear from Moonlight! Despite the crowd’s hatred for the Master Sisters, they are on their feet, cheering on Moonlight’s effort as she wrecks the founders of Hunt By Night. Aurora and Carnival slide to the ring now and the sisters talk a bit to each other, they all nod and Moonlight climbs the turnbuckle, Carnival follows her and Moonlight grabs her in a powerbombing position. Aurora drags Gaia to the middle of the ring and makes sign for her sister to jump. Carnival jumps out of her sibling’s shoulders to hit with a loud Master Chaos on Gaia. Aurora quickly goes for a pin before remembering that this didn’t work in this match. After she gets off of the pin, the referee checks on Gaia, who starts moving again to show that she wasn’t knocked out by the high impact move. 

The sisters look at her but decide to move to the next target because it’s clear Gaia isn’t getting up anytime soon. Aurora points to the outside, where Sophia was starting to get up. Carnival runs over to the corner, vertically leaps to the top rope and falls on top of Sophia, throwing them both into the steel mesh of the cage! This left Nigth Train getting to her feet with both Moonlight and Aurora in the ring. Aurora laughs loudly and screams at Moonlight to catch her. Moonlight follows her orders but Ayano slides under her legs and, when Moonlight turns around she hits her with a surprise Train Wreck, throwing Moonlight to the ground and rolling outside the ring. Aurora looks at Night Train with a mix of surprise and anger and runs against her trying to hit one of her finishing maneuvers as well, a Jumping DDT, but Ayano pulled of her and hits Aurora in the face with a hard Spinning Heel Kick. Night Train starts dancing while Aurora complains loudly, on the floor, the wound on her face even more open now. After the dance Night Train ran to the turnbuckle and connected with a Phoenix Splash, silencing the Master.

Night Train rolls to her feet, looks to the outside, and notices that just about everyone else in the match is getting to their feet at the same time. She doesn’t waste any time running the far ropes, rebounding, then leaping over the ropes with a corkscrew dive to the outside, taking out everyone except for Aurora who is still out cold in the ring! The referee checks on Aurora, but she immediately forces herself to move at least a bit to show she’s still somewhat conscious. On the outside, everyone is down now. Night Train is the first to begin getting back to her feet as she pulls herself up with via the ring apron. Meanwhile, the crowd is chanting “this is awesome!” repeatedly in conjunction with claps.

Night Train rolls back into the ring slowly, but Carnival suddenly has a burst of energy as she gets to her feet and slides into the ring. She quickly runs past Night Train and rebounds off the far ropes before charging toward her Hunt By Night counterpart, leveling her with a Spinning Wheel Kick! Carnival is quick to get back to her feet, thanks to the second wind. She helps Aurora to her feet, who quickly looks at the downed Hunt By Night member before her. Aurora, a natural general, points to Night Train and demands Carnival to get her to her feet. Carnival Irish whips Night Train to the ropes when she comes back, Aurora catches her with a drop toe hold and holds her there as Carnival runs the ropes then dropkicks Night Train in the temple! Unfortunately for the sisters, their dominance is short-lived as Sophia Halter springboards out of nowhere with a Flying Knee Lift to Aurora, dropping her like a sack of potatoes!

Carnival turns around just as Sophia rolls through the landing. Suddenly, they have a staredown and begin trading blows! Sophia gains the upperhand, backing Carnival up. Meanwhile, outside of the ring, Moonlight and Gaia are going toe-to-toe with one another. Moonlight catches Gaia with a random headbutt then sends her back first into the ring stairs! She doesn’t let up as she forces Gaia to her feet. It seems as though the Murderboss side of Moonlight has taken over as she repeatedly sends Gaia head first into the stairs, followed by Gaia going face first to the turnbuckle post, busting The Lioness wide open!

Back in the ring, Sophia Irish whips Carnival who seems to gain a head of steam as she rebounds back toward Sophia, but Sophia sidesteps and tosses Carnival through the ropes to the outside once again. At this point, Aurora has a sudden burst of energy, clearly instead of being knocked out. That’s when she charges directly at her rival, Sophia Halter, and tries to clothesline her! Unfortunately, Sophia is way too quick as she ducks under the attempt, turns around as Aurora tries to fix her folly, but instead finds herself blinded by a mist of Sophia’s own blood! She then steps back a few paces and levels Aurora with a lariat, turning her inside out!

Sophia seems to have forgotten Murderboss though as she goes to grab Aurora who wisely rolls away and out of the ring. Murderboss; however, is in the ring behind Sophia. She whispers something to her causing the headcase to turn around only to meet a sickening KO Punch, dubbed Please Don’t Die! Sophia drops like a sack of potatoes as the referee checks on Sophia. He lifts her arm and releases it, it nearly hits the mat before Sophia stops the free fall! Somehow, Hunt By Night is still in this! On the outside, the camera catches Gaia Galanos pulling herself up with the ring apron, anger evident on her face which is now painted crimson thanks to her own blood. Her blonde hair, stained red.

Gaia rolls into the ring as Murderboss takes notice of her. At this point, both of them are suddenly standing across from one another, glaring, ready to strike. The crowd suddenly begins rising to their feet and getting louder, if that’s possible. They exchange some words then suddenly get closer to one another, nose-to-nose. Electricity seems to be flying between them as Murderboss suddenly throws a bomb of a punch to Gaia, but Gaia absorbs it and fires back with a mean European Uppercut! For the next moment or two, they just take turns exchanging strikes! All the while, the crowd chants “AYYY!” and “BOOOO!” for the respective wrestler. After that long moment, Gaia suddenly gains control and catches Murderboss with a few sickening European Uppercuts before sending her off the ropes then in an AMAZING display of strength presses Murderboss up into the air and allows her to free fall down, but before she hits the ground, Moonlight meets a dastardly European Uppercut! The crowd groans and begins chanting “HOLY SHIT!” repeatedly! Gaia doesn’t waste a single moment though as she locks in the Galanos Clutch, screaming as she pulls back on the hold! Blood drips everywhere as the pure emotion pours from The Lioness! It is very clear by the look on Murderboss’ face, she’s in pain, but is holding on.

When it seems that Moonlight is ready to tap out, Carnival springboards in and makes the save with a dropkick to the side of Gaia’s head, knocking her off of her little (I use this term loosely) sister. Gaia rolls through it though and gets back to her feet immediately as Carnival charges toward her only for Gaia to catch her arm and gain wrist control over her. She then locks her into a Hammerlock then with confusing technical prowess somehow comes out of the lock hitting her patented Brainbuster!

Somehow, Carnival is still moving, but Gaia doesn’t care as much about her so she kicks her out of the ring and goes back to focusing on the Murderboss. Unfortunately, her face off with Carnival took too much time as Moonlight is standing there waiting for her. Gaia charges at her rival only to be Powerslammed out of her boots! Gaia rolls out of the ring and Murderboss follows her. This is when Night Train is back on her feet on the outside, she picks up Carnival who coincidentally isn’t too far from her and rolls her into the ring. Aurora, having recovered, hops on Sophia and just begins doing anything she can to hurt her, pulling the hair, slamming her head on the floor, throwing wild punches, anything.

In the ring, Carnival and Night Train are both very quick to get back to their feet. They go to grapple one another, but find themselves matching one another at every turn with various lucha-style moves. A trip up here, a kip up there, arm wrench, handsprings and cartwheels out of the arm wrench. Some of the moves are even too fast to even tell what they are before they finally meet in the middle of the ring and both attempt dropkicks! They both scramble back to their feet before running past one another, rebounding on opposite ropes, then charging at each other and both hitting crossbodies on each other with a sickening impact!

Aurora rips Sophia to her feet on the outside and tosses her into the ring while Night Train and Carnival both roll out of the ring to continue their brawl on the outside. As Sophia stumbles to get back to her feet, Aurora stalks after her screaming at her and talking all sorts of trash. As Sophia tries to get back to her feet, Aurora shoves her back down with the heel of her foot. Sophia tries again to pull herself to her feet, but receives a smack to the face for her troubles as Aurora continues the verbal assault on Halter. A slap to the back of the head is the final straw as it just completely sets Sophia off who suddenly shrieks in anger and tackles Aurora! She begins pummeling her. Not punching, pummeling all while blood continues to drip from Sophia’s mouth. She spits blood in Aurora eyes as she just continues to wreck her with fists, elbow, headbutts, punches, ANYTHING. Absolutely anything! Meanwhile, Moonlight tries to enter the ring, seeing that Carnival is preoccupied with her brawl with Night Train.

As Moonlight slides in, she finds herself halted when Gaia slides in after her and grapevines her leg, anchoring her in place. At this point, she seems the sickening beating her eldest sister is sustaining at the hands of Sophia Halter and Moonlight suddenly does the unthinkable, she shouts out “WE SURRENDER! WE SURRENDER!” at the referee!

At this point, the referee calls for the bell and tries to get Sophia to stop beating down Aurora, only to be shoved back. It takes Gaia releasing the grapevine on Moonlight and physically pulling Sophia off of Aurora before Sophia stops! Even as Gaia drags Halter off, she takes a few hits from her ally. At this point, the cage is unlocked and the victorious team stumbles out of the cage as they’re announced the victors. Meanwhile, Moonlight checks on her oldest sister while Carnival rolls into the ring in time to see Night Train Ayano, Gaia Galanos, and Sophia Halter at the top of the entrance ramp. Gaia is still trying to keep the pissed Sophia Halter from running back into the ring and continuing the assault as the show comes to a close.

WINNERS in 32:47: Hunt By Night & Sophia Halter

[/b]